Thursday, April 23, 2009

Leap...


Grateful heart - 6 x 9 acrylic & mixed media on MDF

Last week, I listed a whole bunch of things I wanted to get done during one two-day weekend. It was completely unrealistic, but more than that, it was really out of order in terms of where my priorities were, and where they should be -- I had listed primarily a bunch of house chores and spring cleaning, and at the very end -- the very last item was "stock up on canvasses and paint hearts."

Fortunately, a fellow artist pointed out that it should be at the top of the list -- and of course she was right. Her observation stopped me in my tracks because it was so obvious. For months (and months) I have been lamenting my lack of artistic inspiration and patiently (and then not so patiently) waiting for its return. And when it finally returns, with great momentum, I decide to clean my house, and even to dismantle my art room and re-arrange???? What's up with that??? It really made me ask myself why I would deiberately put obstacles in the way of my art-making. At first I didn't have an answer. I was just grateful that it was brought to my attention so that I could stop myself from self-sabatoge.

But the truth is that I know the answer. It's fear. Of the unknown. Of success. Of change. Of where this path may lead. It may require work, and sweat, and diving into uncharted waters.

I can't totally stop myself from feeling this way. But I hope that by being more aware will help me to step back, and take a deep breath and then... leap!

5 comments:

Liz Ness said...

My feed keeps updating a day late...so I just saw yesterday's heart -- I came to say, "YUM!" Then, I saw today's -- every single one of these is soooo amazing. Thanks for all of the magic and light you're sharing via your heart(s)!

Saucy Chick Sherry said...

What a fantastic journey you are on with your heart art. I think your muse is being very good to you. Keep hearting...

Marilyn Rock said...

Kerri; your leap has already begun. You've taken the jump and I, for one, will always be here for you. I love your hearts!!!! This one is awesome!

Kim Hambric said...

In my humble opinion, sometimes you have to remove the dirt and cobwebs and have a clean start for your art.

Of course, I'm cleaning out my studio instead of making art. Perhaps I'm just rationalizing what I'm doing.

Love your hearts!

julie king said...

your work is wonderful so i really hope you can put the fear aside and go for it! i struggle with all of this as well. i just have to tell myself to create for the joy of creating and let all the what ifs fall to the wayside!